September 11, 2001 was the day I woke up feeling terror. I laid on the couch for a month crying so much I felt like I would run out of tears. It did not matter which political party any of us belonged to; we were all one.

I will admit, I looked at middle eastern people differently and felt fear. As time passed, I got my head straight and did what I always do - knock on the door of my fear and go inside. To me, that is the only way to learn, reduce anxiety and wipe out fear of the unknown. The last thing I would do was let someone define a class of people, pour gasoline on it and light it on fire to further their pursuit of money and power.

Because we are human, we often take the easier path and let others sum ‘it’ up for us. If we think ‘hmmm, that sounds right,’ we begin to believe it and adopt that way of thinking whether it’s true or not; it doesn’t matter because it’s now part of our identity. It’s much harder to do the work, talk to others, read, and be objective. I believe that’s what many politicians count on. When we do this, we are giving away our power.

After 9/11 I reached out to a friend of mine who worked (and still does) closely with the Muslim community. She isn’t Muslim. In fact, she’s a white chick from Illinois. She and I went to college together in the 80’s. Ever since I’ve known her, she has unselfishly served others. I don’t mean at a soup kitchen on Thanksgiving, I mean, living in El Salvador working with the poor, seeing people die because of heinous human rights violations abroad, working on a school project in the middle east when she encountered an attack and a Muslim family took her in and gave her shelter; the kind of work most of us pretend isn’t real and write off anyone who doesn’t ‘try harder.’ This includes myself; or, at least it did for most of my life.

My girlfriend has taught me a lot, mostly through her example of just being. I asked questions, she answered; I went to a mosque and talked with Muslims; I have prayed with Muslims. Never in my life have I found more generous, embracing and loving Americans. Ever.

My point here is most people fear what they don’t know. Opportunists know that and use it to empower themselves at our expense. I challenge you to knock on those doors that you fear so much, ask questions and come with the openness and innocence of your 5-year old self. I believe you will find that there is nothing to fear but fear itself.

“. . .let me assert my firm belief that the only thing we have to fear is fear itself—nameless, unreasoning, unjustified terror which paralyzes needed efforts to convert retreat into advance.” FDR

In remembrance of 9/11, don’t just post ‘never forget’ to your social media pages, reach for people that are different than you and share with each other without judgement. Do the work and you will help to build a more perfect union as its always intended to be. Do it for the 2,996 lives that were so horrifically lost that day. Together, we are strongest and together we can ensure that this never happens again.